That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
