if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
