I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
