I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
