He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
