Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
