i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
My vagina is officially offended.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
