You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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