I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
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i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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