how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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