Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
