I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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