she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
