i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
