just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
