I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
