If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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