We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
she pinky promised me she was 18
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize