What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
