Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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