And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
