I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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