So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
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The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
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I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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