Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize