i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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