You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize