i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
