maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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