i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
