oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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