i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
