I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
