Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
love makes seman taste better
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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