He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
