i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
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I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
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I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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