Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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