Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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