how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
