I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
you told grandpa to call you daddy
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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