looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
