I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
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