you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize