Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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