Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
