she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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