Need sex. Gaining weight.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
