goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
