He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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