I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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