The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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